


Blind

by StinkerStine



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, Friends With Benefits, Oliver is stupid sometimes, olicity - Freeform, relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-09
Updated: 2016-07-09
Packaged: 2018-07-22 12:31:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7439426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StinkerStine/pseuds/StinkerStine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oliver offers Felicity a friends with benefits relationship. What happens when everything goes wrong?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Blind

**Author's Note:**

> Hi,  
> i am back. I spend the last three month in Sweden. I wrote alot in the time but somehowe i never published it until today. My stories still need some work but fingers crossed by next weekend i can update them all.   
> Until then here is oneshot for all you Olicity lovers out there.   
> I hope you enjoy it and maybe even leave a comment.

The deafening silence in the room was to much for him to take. There should be even breathing beside him, or he should hear the shower running. Hell he would be even happy to hear noises from the kitchen, even when it meant that he would get food poising again. 

It wasn't supposed to be like this, but he knew that he only could blame himself for the silent in his home. A home that was filled with laughter the last couple of month. 

He was supposed to wake up to her laughter and her word babble that seemed to be more in the morning. Hell, he even would take her extreme moodiness when he woke her up to early after a long night.

He didn't wake up to any of this, because she wasn't here. She was gone and he had no one else to blame then himself.

He tossed the covers off and swung his legs out of the bed. He hung his head and rested it in his hands, wondering how they had gotten to this point. 

Regardless of how much he wanted to deny it, he knew that he was to blame for them to be at this point. He brought them to the point. To the point where he lost her for good. 

It all started one night at the foundry. Once again both were the last one there. She was checking some leads and he was , he doesn't even know anymore what he was doing, that night. He just knows that at one point he was sitting next to her at the computers and she was so irresistibly close. One move and he could have swept her into his lap and it scared him how much he just wanted to do it.   
Before his brain could catch up with his mouth words he never thought he could say escaped his mouth. Words that maybe his old self would have said but not him. Not to her. He proposed a “friends with benefits” arrangement between them. He could almost hear her jaw drop.

He allowed his thought to wander all the way back to the night, just now he realized what an idiot he'd been to even suggest, let alone initiate such a relationship with her. He was even more surprised that she accepted his proposition. He remembers that the tried to ignore the look of disappointment in her eyes that flashed when he mention a relationship that lacked the normal “couple “ things. He deliberatly pushed her disappointment away and focused on the brilliant smile that lit up her face seconds later. He knew that he wasn't ready to offer her the relationship she deserved but he thought somehow this would be a compromise that both could live with. What a fool he been. He'd been foolish enough to think that a strictly sexual relationship would be enough, for her and for all form him. That the longing would fade away. But at first it seemed that it worked, that it was enough. For two month they enjoyed the exciting sex, without the complications of a “relationship” .

Or hadn't they. Looking back he realizes that it had always been more complicated, more relationship - like then he was ready to admit. They had spend every moment of the last two month together. The days spend in the office the nights split between the foundry and his apartment. They talked and laughed more then ever. He even invited her on slow nights to a dinner and the movie. And then there was the sex, the mind blowing, live – changing sex.   
If he was honest with himself it wasn't just sex. If they would been truly just “friends with benefits” he should have been okay with her leaving her afterwards. But that never happened. After every encounter, if she even showed the slightest hint of wanting to leave him, he pulled her wordlessly closer and tightened his arms around her, robbing her of the chance to move.

They both had agreed that they could see other people but neither of them took advantage of it. Until one night two days ago. The night the downfall began. 

Moira had planned one of her usual parties and she required that everyone would bring a date. And because he insisted to Felicity that their relationship was strictly sexual, they both had escorted other people to the party.  
He still remembers the moment she walked in, a strapless dark red dress clinging to her body. He also could vividly remember the rage he felt when he saw the man that had his arm around Felicity. He was way to close to her. He didn't know who that man was and he had no desire to find out. The only thing he wanted that this guy, this asshole, to release his girl. He needed to remind himself at least fifty time that she wasn't his girl. That he hasn't have a claim on her, that what they had wasn't serious, that she could go out with who ever she wanted. They were just friends with benefits. But why wouldn't this bitter taste in his mouth disappear. His date was a complete bore, he shouldn't have let his mother set him up, he doesn't even remember her name anymore. She was beautiful and not stupid and the old Ollie would have her naked and beneath him in seconds. All that didn't matter anymore. The moment Felicity walked in his eyes were glued to every move she made. He notice every detail about her . How her date wanted to hold her to close when she danced with him. The way her date eyed her like she was for sale and the guy definitely wanted to buy. 

Over his dead body. Where were his arrows when he needed them. 

Later on that evening, he had noticed her escape down the hall towards an empty office and had impulsively decided to follow her. He'd stalked down the hall, stopping only when he'd seen her entering the office. He'd pursued her, slamming and locking the door behind him.  
She'd spun around, surprised by his arrival and his actions. "Oliver, what are you doin—"  
He'd cut her off with his lips and pinned her roughly against the wall. He remembered how her body had struggled against him at first, surprised by his assault on her senses. But within seconds, she had relaxed and lifted her hands to his neck, bringing him as close as two people could get. Impulsively, he had continued kissing her and running his hands along her curves, trailing one hand under the hem of her skirt. She had notobjected; in fact, she had almost purred at the presence of his hand under her clothing. Although it had not been what he'd intended, they had proceeded to have sex right there, leaning against the wall of the office. Good that this one had no windows, it reminded him of her office down in the IT – Department.

There'd been no time for basking in the afterglow, however. He'd made the mistake of mentioning that they should really get back to the party. He'd seen the hurt flash in her eyes. And as if realizing what they had just done, she'd pushed him away roughly, and straightened her clothing quickly.  
"You're right, I need to get back to my date," she'd spit out, seething visibly. And he'd done nothing to stop her as she'd stomped out of the office. She'd spent the rest of the night clinging to her date, and he'd utilized his time by furiously boring holes into her date's back and dreaming about shooting him with all the arrows he had.   
Since then she'd barely spoken to him. She hadn't shown up to work yesterday, calling in to say she was 'sick'. After getting an earful from Diggle, he knew the only 'sick' Felicity had been was seemingly of him. He had been stupid enough to expect everything would just blow over and go back to the way things were. He should have known better. After all this was Felicity he was talking about. She was overemotional on a good day. But after their encounter at the party, something seemed to have shifted. And it had scared the hell out of him. He'd hated feeling so disconnected from her.  
He'd been heading to bed last night when he'd heard a soft knock on his door. Opening it, he'd found Felicity staring back at him, her eyes full of resolution and sadness. And without saying anything, he's known she had come to end it. "It" being whatever exactly their relationship was.  
She had walked in, pausing as she'd reached the spot in the middle of the living room. Then she had stated the two words he'd known were coming. "It's over."  
Although he'd wanted to, he hadn't protested. He had stood idly in the spot by the door, not knowing what to say or do. He'd felt a million emotions rising within him, but he hadn't acted upon any of them.

Then she had surprised him even further by sliding off her jacket and throwing it onto the couch. "I want you once more," she'd announced, leaving him speechless. "I want to try to ingrain in my memory what it's like to be with you. And then I'll walk out of here and we'll go back to being what we were before." She'd paused, and then continued, clearly  
feeling like she needed to give some sort of explanation for her decision. "Oliver, I need to stop hiding from reality. I need to find a relationship that's not going to leave me with a broken heart when you get tired of having sex with me…" she'd trailed off, turning her head to brush a tear off her face.  
He had opened his mouth to speak, knowing he needed to say something, to tell her that would never happen. He could never get tired of her, of anything about her. Ever.  
But in what he characterized as "customary Oliver behaviour", he had said nothing. He'd let her lead him to the bedroom and they made love; he had wished every moment that he could do something to prolong the end. But like everything else, it did end. And in their normal routine, when her sweaty body slid off of his, she'd snuggled into his side and closed her eyes.  
His hopes had risen, and he'd murmured the only words he could think of. "Stay..." He remembered hearing the strained tone of his own voice as he'd tried to hide the desperation he was feeling.  
She hadn't responded, but she hadn't moved away either. He'd drifted helplessly off to sleep, praying that he'd have a chance in the morning to change her mind.

Now, morning had come and he was all alone. And as he lifted his head from his hands, it became clear that he wasn't going to get that chance to change her mind. She must have left sometime during the night, not wanting to confront him with a 'goodbye' this morning.  
What an idiot he'd been. The panic began to rise within him as he contemplated his future without her. He couldn't lose her. And he most definitely couldn't watch her with someone else. More than anything, he wanted her to be happy. But he wanted her to experience that happiness with him.  
Because… well…  
He began to work through the thoughts in his muddled brain. And then it hit him, as if he'd been struck by a tractor-trailer. He stood up, beginning to pace as the realization sunk in.  
He loved her.  
How had he not recognized it before? He'd hidden his feelings with the lie that he couldn't handle a relationship or didn't want one. But he now saw that that was  
ridiculous. Now that she was gone, he could see what really wanted. What he really wanted all along.  
Her.  
He began to feel dizzy, and he sat slowly back down on the bed.  
What if it was too late?

 

She was bored. More accurately, she had never been so bored in her entire life. She was sitting across from a handsome, rich, investment banker that Laurel had set her up with. And he was blathering on about mutual funds and the importance of investing early, especially with the wealth she had been accumulating. She couldn't help wondering if this guy was more worried about the possible client he'd have in her than showing her a nice time on their date. She'd have to kill Sadie later for this.  
Actually, she knew it wasn't Laurels's fault. She was the one who had shown up at Laurels and Tommy's this afternoon begging her to set her up with someone. Anyone to get her to stop thinking about Oliver. Anyone that might distract her so that she didn't go running back to Oliver's apartment, begging for just one more night.  
She'd woken up in Oliver's arms at 3:00 am, wanting to do anything but leave the warmth of his tight embrace. They'd gotten in the habit of sleeping tightly entwined and last night was no exception. She'd had the delicate task of extricating her limbs from Oliver's before she could make her escape. She had almost talked herself into staying the night when she'd realized how much harder it would be to face him in the morning when he was awake. When she'd be even more tempted to allow things to go on like they were and she couldn't do that. So she'd decided to do the cowardly thing and slink off into the night. But not before she'd stolen one last kiss. After silently throwing her clothes back on, she had leaned over him, kissing him on the lips. She'd been shocked when he'd returned her kiss, but she'd relished every last second of it. She'd pulled back, angry at herself for kissing him and waking him up, now forced to deal with that goodbye she hadn't wanted to confront. But when she'd pulled back, she'd noticed that his eyes were still shut, and he was still breathing deeply. He'd whispered her name quietly, and she had realized that he was dreaming. Apparently about her. It had been a poignant, but also bittersweet, parting moment. And then, going against every cell in her body that was telling her to stay, she'd dragged herself away. She'd felt the tears falling before she'd even reached the apartment door.

"Do you want to order dessert?"  
Her head shot up as her date looked at her expectantly.  
"No, thanks. I'm actually pretty tired. I think I should be heading home," she refused politely.  
Luckily her date, who obviously could tell she was distracted, did not protest. He didn't make much more conversation, paying the cheque and politely helping her into his shiny sports car. She loved sports cars, but this one was the wrong one. She had a soft spot for gray Porsche that belonged to Oliver Queen  
She shuddered, trying to put him out of her mind. They were done. Whatever ridiculous dysfunctional thing they had was over. It had to be. Every time Oliver reminded her that they were only friends, and that she was free to date other people, her heart broke a little more, and she couldn't keep putting herself through that. The thought that Oliver only wanted sex from her made her heart seize in her chest. And it made her feel the slightest bit dirty. As much as she wanted to blame him, she knew she couldn't. She had known exactly what she was getting into by agreeing to a casual sexual relationship with him. She had known at the time that it was the exact opposite of what she'd wanted, but she had figured she would take what she could get. But she'd assumed that eventually it would progress into a real relationship. And honestly, she'd thought it had. But two nights ago, at the party, the truth hit her soundly in the face. Oliver wasn't going to change, and he didn't want anything deeper than sex. She couldn't deal with that from him, not in the long term; not from the only man she would ever love. She knew that sounded really overdramatic, but she also knew it was true.  
She knew that eventually she would love someone else. Once her heart mended a little, she'd meet a guy who treated her well and she'd eventually get married. But the kind of love that she felt for Oliver only happened once in a lifetime. And she wasn't about to waste it in a sham of a relationship that was doomed from the start.

Her date dropped her off in front of her apartment building, not even bothering to get out of the car. Clearly, he hadn't been thrilled with how the night had progressed either. She heard his car race away as she approached the door. What a disaster that had been. Not only had he not been interesting at all, she hadn't even remotely accomplished her goal of forgetting Oliver.   
She just wanted to curl up on her bed and sleep the rest of the pitiful night away. And try to deal with the reality that she would likely never find anyone who excited her or made her heart race the way Oliver did. But she wanted more, so much more than Oliver was willing to give her. And she wasn't going to settle for less any more.  
She walked into the lobby, heading immediately towards the elevator.  
"Found someone else already?"  
She turned immediately as she heard the all too familiar voice, rife with humor and a hint of panic, coming from behind her. And there, in all his glory, was Oliver Queen. The man whose kisses brought her to her knees. And also the only man who could leave her so devastated that she found it difficult to breathe.  
Taking in his perfectly styled hair, she felt a wave of memories washing over her. She remembered what it was like to wake up next to him in the morning and see his hair sticking out in all directions. His eyes were bright, and she thought about how his eyes crinkled and sparkled when he laughed at a particularly funny movie, or something silly that she had done. She'd seen parts of this man that most people would never see. And that made it all that much harder to walk away from him. Or look at him now, standing only a few short feet away from her.  
"Oliver, as you so kindly pointed out many times, I can go out with whomever I want."  
"Well, the way you ran from his car, I'm guessing it won't be him." She was annoyed at the touch of humor in his voice.  
"What do you want?" she asked, trying to hide the dejection, but knowing she was failing miserably.  
His face took on a more determined look as he bridged the distance between them. He reached forward to cup her face with his hands. She could hear her breathing becoming erratic as he gently traced her cheekbone with his thumb, leaning forward so that his face was irresistibly close to her own. "You. I want you." His voice was low and husky, and she had to put all her effort into keeping her knees from buckling beneath her.  
He moved his face closer, bringing his lips down towards her. She knew she should have moved, pushed him roughly away. But she couldn't. One more kiss... even if it killed her, she couldn't walk away from this moment.  
His lips moved slowly against her own, and he moved his hands down to her hips, bringing her whole body flush against his. She helplessly swung her arms around him, reveling in the security of being in his arms again. Even if it couldn't last.

His lips captured hers more fervently, and as her lips parted in surprise he took the opportunity to deepen the kiss. She fisted the material of his shirt, keeping her unsteady body as close to his as she could.  
He broke the kiss, moving to place a few kisses on the curve of her neck. As the delirious fog began to lift, the one that always came over her when Oliver kissed her, she noticed that everyone was staring at them. Well, they were making out in the middle of the lobby; she couldn't really blame anyone for gawking.  
Despite how good his lips felt on her neck, she wrenched herself out of his tight embrace and backed away from him.  
His eyebrows rose in confusion at the distance she placed between them.  
"That doesn't change anything," she said breathlessly. "I can't do it. I can't go back to what we were. I respect that you don't want more, but I do." Her voice was taking on a high pitch, and she knew she was beginning to ramble.  
"But Fe—" he interrupted, but she wouldn't let him speak.  
"No. Nothing you could say will convince me to change my mind. It's too hard. I can accept that you don't feel the same way, but I can't-"  
"I love you!" he yelled, the only way he knew to stop her from talking.  
It certainly worked. Her jaw dropped and all she could do was stare at him dumbfounded. "You..."  
"I love you," he said, his voice soft and warm this time as he said it. "I was planning to tell you in some special way but I was afraid if I didn't tell you now you might never let me say it."  
She was still shocked. "But... what happened... I don't understand.." She couldn't piece everything together in her mind. Only 48 hours ago, he was still happy with their no strings arrangement.  
He grabbed her hands and held them against his chest. "I was scared. I fuck things up. That's kind of my M.O. And I thought if we could just be together, but not in a relationship, I had less chance of screwing things up. I'm sorry, it wasn't fair to you and I should have seen that."

She could feel a smile forming on her lips as his words began to sink in. "So... what are you saying, Oliver? You want a real relationship? And a real commitment?" she asked, still a little skeptical.  
"I want it all. I'm just sorry it took me so long to realize it." He was smiling, but she could see in his eyes that he was still a bit anxious that his words weren't getting through to her.  
He opened his mouth to say something else, and she attacked his lips. She didn't need to hear anything else. She was convinced the moment he'd said he loved her. The words she had waited so long to hear.  
She kissed him ardently, wrapping her arms around his neck to pull him down further towards her. His arms twined around her waist, pressing their bodies closer together.  
Eventually she pulled back, in dire need of oxygen. She rested her forehead against his, looking into the depths of his blues eyes. Eyes that spoke of the love he had for her. "I love you, Queen," she whispered.  
He smiled, "I love you too, Smoak." He pressed his lips to hers again, placing a brief kiss on her lips, then her cheek, then the corner of her eyes.  
Her eyes caught sight of the other people in the lobby, still staring transfixed at the scene playing out in front of them.  
"Do you want to come up?" she asked, smiling in anticipation of the reunion they would partake of once they got to her apartment.  
He smiled, obviously envisioning the same scene. "I thought you'd never ask."  
He grabbed her hand, leading her towards the elevator. With his other hand, he waved at some of the bystanders who were still shamelessly watching them.  
As they waited for the elevator, he leaned in to whisper in her ear. "Do you want to take a bow? I think they enjoyed the show."  
She moved closer, leaning up to whisper back, "Nah… Besides, we have our own show to get to."  
He laughed loudly, as the elevator chimed its arrival on the main floor. As they stepped in, and the doors closed behind them, he turned towards her, his lips hovering above her. "I like the way you think, Felicity " he said huskily, before his lips finally descended upon hers.


End file.
